50 shades of Chrom
by biggestotaku
Summary: There are better places than to take a nap on the ground.
1. Chapter 1

it was a beautiful day and chrom just slaughtered this man bty ripping off his dick and twisting it and choking the man on his dick blood. then the war was won and he saw robin and he was like "!hey babe lets get married." he said in a not so romantic way bc of the dick blood on his face.

"ok ily" robin said in her cute robin voice and then chrom ppicked her up and they got on frederick's horse and rode into the sunset. frederick screamed bc that was his horse but then lissa grabbed his ass and he farted. then chrom and robin got married.

it was their honey moon and robin and chrom were kisisng and it was like and orgy but with lips. then robin decided to take off her clothes and chrom was like "what why are you taking off ur clothes o well ill take mine off to." thne chrom had a chard time taking off his clothes bc wtf is his outfit lmao. then robin finally just used fire magic to burn it off and then she looked at chrom's donger and it was a nice donger.

"my eyes are...up here." chrom said. and then robin pushed him down onto the bed and he got a boner.

"wow its never done that before." chrom said and then robin got on top of him and then she was about to lower herself on the peener and then-

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! I PEE FROM THERE!" CHROm screamed and started to violently shake robin off and robin was so confused.

"chrom we need to have sex" robin said. "we need to make lucina." robin said and got back on bed and then she shoved her boobs in chrom's eyes.

"but we already kissed and then youll get pregnant in ur tummy mmm" chrom said and then he started to touch the boob with his eyebrow.

"what the fuck chrom what the fuck who RAISED YOU. this is what ur mom and dad did when they made u and ur sisters" robin said and then chrom gasped.

"NOT MY DAD!" then suddenly the door was busted open. it was male robin and he was already naked.

"ITS TIME TO WRECK UR ASS AND TAKE CUM SAMPLES SO I CAN DROWN IN A SEA OF CUM AND TIP THE CUM SCALES BKINHPORTNGTR" malerobin said and then he jumped on chrom and female robin watched and her boobs were jiggling and then chrom started screaming as ROBIN WAS SHOVING HIS ENTIREE fing er up chrom's butthole.

"I POOP FROM THERE!" CHROM screamed and male robin screamed "SO DO I!" then female robin pulled male robin off of chrom and threw him across the room. "theses sweet nipples are mine asscheeks" she hissed and then robin picked up his sword out of his asshole and screamed "I CHALLENGE YOU" then femrobin hissed "bitch go away this isnt smash i just want to get n orgasm and have a cute bby girl." then she lowered herself on chrom's donger.

"what if i pee in ur peepee..." chrom said and fem robin was like " oh bby itll be ok." then she started to ride chrom and moan loudly and male robin poopped a boner and it dragged him towards chrom and fem robin punched male robin's boner and he screamed and feel to the floor abd then it only took chrom 30 seconds to cum. but it was a mix of cum and pee and fem robin got turned off but oh well shell be pregnant later. then she got off of chrom.

"u kno what i teach him how to have sex i cant even GET OFF." robin said and she left robin with chrom and chrom was on the bed and he was like sitting there like a puppy who learned where pee came from. he also have butthole problems. like his butthole wouldnt do it job and it was too tight for shit so chrom barely took a shit. he was on a strict liquid diet.

"wannt me to treahc u the sex for my female self." robin said and he sat next to chrom and stared at his dick.

"yes,"

"my tastes are very singular" robin said and then he started to pull something out of his coat. (he was still wearing jjust his coat so it was sexy.)

"ooh. enlighten me then" chrom said in a girly voice. and then robin pulled out a a paddle and handed it to chrom and bended over. "spank me" robin said.


	2. 50 shades of Robin's ass

chrom began to spank robina dn rboin screamed in pleasure and then he started bleeding!

"no!" chrom screamed and he busted out of the sent w/ robin in hand and ran to the nearest walmart.

"i need some muppet bandaids this is an emergency" chrom screamed and showed the cashier robin's naked ass.

"omfg arent you the guys in smash except the blue one doesnt really do anything bc hes not really a playable character lol" then chrom got sad and peed on teh cashier and ran to the pharmacy. he looked aty the bandaids and what he was looking for didnt come accross his eyes..

"WHERE ARE THE MUPPET BANDAIDS?!" then chrom threw robin onto the floor and starting to look desparatly for the muppet bandaids. he wanted to put kermit the frog on robin's sweet ass.

"look chrom! they have hello kitty bandaids!" robin smiled in delight and he picked up the pink box and chrom gasped.

"who do you think you are?lucina?"then chrom snatched the bandaids and pocketed them...just incase lucina got a booboo later. then chrom statrted to cry and then he started smashing all the pill botles in walmsrt because WHAT KIND OF WALMART DOESNT HAVE MUPPET BANDAIDS? HUH? WELL MY LOCAL WALMART DIDNT TODAY AND I WAS SAD AND then he statrted crying and robin comforted him adn then people surrounded them.

"gasp!theres an naked anime!call the police!" this middle aged women said and dialed 911 and then the cops busted in and then they arrested robin for being naked, chrom had a loincloth on so it was ok.

"no!i need to give him bandaids!" then the cops laughed at chrom and took robin away.

chrom sighed and then he decided he would have to bail robin out. then chrom went outside and walked snf walked to chucke cheeses and then he got tokens and started to plsy whack a mole for 4 horus straight. then chromw as asked t leave because his ass was distracting the animatronics. then chrom walked outside but he had a lot of chucke cheese tokens left over. then he checked his penis..

"WHO PUT SPIDE R S ON ME DICK!?LDFKID BLS XCTB8:29 PM 2/13/20157k TEFF;EIXDOHHHHHHV V DCDCDCDCDCDCDCDCDCDCDCX OUCH I JUST TRIED TO SMASH MY HEADAND VLFKDKGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBGBFD XC,.?" Then chrom sighed and ran to the county jial and knoced on the door and walke din robin was in the jail cell...

"roibin!chrom cried out. amd he tried to run towards his whit ehaired animeboy and then he was held back by dojima and adachi.

"baile dhim out. " dojima sia dnad then chrom pulled some coins out of his ass. they were chucke cheese tokens.

"please...except these...this is the only thing i have..." chrom got on his knees and adachi was like "DOJIMA TAKE THOSE I WANNA GO TO CHUCKE CHEESE" then he was like ok and then he let robin out and then chrom and robin went to walmart and brought caprisun and then went hame and started drinking all the caprisuns...they drank so much they got HIGH. then the two youing sheep went into and orgy with gaius and lon'qu and it was all fun until gaius decided it was a good idea to shove a snicker's bar up robin's ass.


	3. 50 shades of

ok so robin decided to go and tuck lil morgan into bed.

"read me a bed time story daddy!" said lil morgan and she got under the covers.

"morgan ur like 14 i dont think-" robin said before he noticed morgan was holding a gun to his head. "read."

"ok!" robin said and opened the book. "once upon a time there was this young man named ash and he wanted to be a pokemon master. he was kinda stupid and overslept and he got the shittiest pokemon of them all, pikachu. all pikachui did was poop and he even outpooped brock's onix-" then morgan closed the book RIGHT ON ROBINS DICK! then there was blood and lots of censorship and morgan began to cry bc this was her first time ever seeing a real life penis. shes probably a lesbian now. there was so much blood. morgan was crying and then she ran out of bed, robin passed out due to deflating of his dick and blood loss.

"chrom!cCHORMRORORMRM!FREDEDICK!"morgan screamed and chrom came running and frederick dropped from the cieling screaming.

"what is it morgan?!" chrom said. morgan was crying still and she was sobbing and there was snot.

"sweetie!calm down and tell me what happened..." chrom said and then morgan tried to calm down and then lucina came out and she suddenly got defensive of morgan (her and morgan were dating)

"DAD WHAT DID YOU DO TO MORGAN!?~!?" lucina screamed and punched her dad right in the nose nad hse picked morgan up.

"i didnt do anything~!" chrom insisted and then morgan spoke up.

"ok so daddy was reading this really terrible story and i didnt like it so i slammed the book shut and i think i accidently ruined his peepee..."

"what the fuck" said frederick.

then morgan began to cry and lucina was like "dad im gay and now im going to go comfort morgan. and maybe have lesbian sex idk." lucina said and hugged morgan.

"holy shit im gay too." chrom said. then sumia came out RIGHT WHEN HE SAID THAT.

"oh my god im a lesbian im so sorry i didnt tell u earlier chrom but i still love our kids. i still love u chrom but not in the hetero way. no hetero." sumia said and then she jumped off a cliff and died(actually, retired) bc shes was only relavent for that one line.

"am i the only straight one in the building?" frederick asked.

"stop acting like ur straight u have butt fucked me so many-" "WE DO NOT SPEAK FO THAT MILORD" frederick put his hand over chrom's mouth.

"well uh. im gonna take morgan to my room. u go fix robin's dick bc i dont want a tactician with a broken dick." then lucina brought morgan to her room bridal style and comforted.

chrom then ran into the room where robin was and he was laying on the floor, with a deflated dick, he still had that snickers bar stuck up his ass. chrom screamed and held robin in his hands.

"robin!wake up!" chrom started to cry. thne robin opened his eyes.

"chrom..." he said vbery weakly.

"ROBIN!"

"shut the fuck up youre really noisy and im trying to sleep." robin said before passing out againa dn going into a coma...a deep...deep...coma.

"ROBIN!" chrom did the sparkly anime tears thing and then he thought that fukcing robin's body would wake him uppp... so he sucked the snicker's bar out of his ASS and ate it. it was poopy flavoured but it was robins poop was it tasted delicious. then he used the snickers' wrapper as a condom and put himself inside of robin without lube and then he began fucking him. robin wouldnt wake up. chrom got desperate so he began to thrust harder and then naga busted down the door.

"what the HELL." naga said and chrom stopped and pulled out.

"this isnt what it looks like im just triyng to bring him back.."chrom tried to come up with something but naga was screaming.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO. your grounded but u need to bring back robin." naga said and then chrom was like ok.

"ok but u need to like. rip off dicks that equal to 100 inches to revive him." naga said.

"wtf ok i love dicks." chrom said and then he busted down the doors. time to hunt down some dongers...for the robin to wake up so he can read more shitty bed time stories to morgan.


	4. Chapter 4

ok so chrom began running around and suddenly he saw a bathroom in the middle of no where and he heard singing from the shower...he went in and saw aversa!but she actually had a dick !?but ti was like 100 inches.

"i must murder u...bc i hate u...and i need that dick to save my husband from this world." the chrom lunged at her and aversa screamed and tried to push him off but then chrom took the sword out his penis and slash aversa in half and ripped ovff her dick...finally...robin with be safe...then chrom decided to throw aversa's dickless body down the shower drain and then suddenly he heard a voice...it sounded a lot like his!

"hello." said the voice.

"uh?hello? im sorry but this penis is mine." chrom said and protectivly held the penis close to his body.

then the voice source came out and it was another chrom?!

"look at you, stealing a dick from a poor girl just so you can save stupid robin." the other chrom said.

"stupid?!robin isnt stupid." chrom argued.

"um yea he is, you should know that. because im u." the other chrom said and he stepped closer to chrom and chrom got defenseive and stepped back and the other chrom stepped forward.

"youre not me!you may be as handsome at me, but youre not me!" chrom purred. because like i read this one fanfiction where chroma dn robin were purring? but they were giving each other blowjobs. it was bad.

"i think the ground is the best place to take a nap." the other chrom. "i actually hate all my marriage candiates. except for female robin, shes got nice titt-

"I WOULD NEVER THINK TH-"chrom tried to interupt but toher chrom wasnt going to stop!

"im actually really pissed off that lucina hid her identity from me, because i wanted to fuck her at first. i cant believe i thought of my daughter that way! but it also pisses me off how my best friend, ugly robin, can fuck my daughter? bitch no thats my baby girl. but really, i just want robin's sweet penis all to myself. his cum is so sweet and-"

"STOP SOTP SOTP STOP!GODS!ALL YOU SPEAK ARE LIES!LIES!YOURE NOT ME!" chrom screamed at the other chrom and tried to run away but he bumped into female robin.

"chrom stop-dont say anything else!" robin tried to stop him but chrom screamed again.

"YOURE NOT ME!" then the other chrom started laughing and then he turned into something weird and started quoting "i am the shadow, the true self. and ill crush anything that gets between me and MY robin." shadow chrom said and chrom held the giant dick close and then he hid behind female robin.

"chrom when this is over im going to have to ask you who is lucina's real mother?is it me or su-SHIT." then shadow chrom slung his giant dick at female robin and she was hit critically and then she got pissed off because no one interupts her. then robin pulled out her tomes and began to slaughter shadow chrom and then she finally calmed him down and then he stood up.

"you better fucking face yourself so we can tal-" then robin was struck by shadow chrom's dick! she squealed and then fell to the floor.

"no!chrom picked her up!wake up!you ARE lucina's mother!dont you remember?! you gave birth to her!sumia is fukcing crazy!but shes dead now!" chrom tried to say and robin just glared at him. "g-g-go f-f-" she was about to say.

"fuck myself? ok!" then chrom went na dfucked his shadow. 'wow you are me we even have the same dick size." then hsi shadow went away.

"ok robin ill fix u up." chrom said and then he heard as voice in the back of his mind (you have to sacrifice the dick to save the girl)

"god damn it." chrom whsipered before sacrificing the DICK HE TRIED SO HARD TO GET to female robin and she was revived and then she got upa nd punched chrom.

"whAT THE HELL WERE YOU DOING!? but im glad im lucina's mother." robin said and then she started walking.

"uh. robin do u know where i cna find another 100 inche dick? i kinda need to save robin, not u, but male robin." chrom said.

"yea. i do." she said and pulled off her gloves and started to paint her nails.

"oh!great!can you tell me?" chrom asked and then he looked at robin's boobers.

"no."

"why not!?gods!i need them!" chrom was upset.

"because you wont fondle my boobs." robin said and then chrom ripped off her close and being to fondle her boobs and then he shoved his face in them and fell asleep and then he slept there for 3 hours bc he was tired. thne he woke up.

"ok it's gaius, i saw him naked one time. he has a 106 inch so only cut off as much as you need, k? he needs that 6 inche part so i can use him for breeding purposes."


End file.
